Showing posts with label Motivational. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Motivational. Show all posts

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Break the mold of what it means to be beautiful!


I've been really excited write about this touchy subject. It affects women everywhere at any age and is the center of most women's insecurities. I'm talking about society's definition of what it means to be beautiful and let's be honest it's everywhere. On T.V.' s, computers, magazines,billboards, it's even spreading to our food! I don't care how good the model looks on my cereal box, as long as my cereal is fresh then I'm happy. It's on every women's mind every second of the day whether you're counting calories so you can fit in that little black dress or touching up makeup to keep up the illusion of a flawless face. It's an epidemic a disease and we're the primary carriers spreading it across the country like the plague.
Society is filled with misconceptions of what the perfect woman should look and act like and hasn't changed since what seems like the stone ages, and to make matters even worse social media and technology has become a huge part of society today. It's become strong enough to shut down businesses (R.I.P. Blockbuster) and has somehow managed to threaten the existence of books a staple in society since the beginning of time is now an endangered species. So when this mold was created (semi-unintentionally) by celebrities, models, commercials, etc, it stuck around like glue. Let's take a moment and think about what your definition of the "ideal woman" would be. Is she tall and skinny, curvy or toned with perfect hair and glowing skin, is she a glamorous celebrity, or none of the above? Now take a second again and pretend you're a man  (yes you read that correctly) you're given two women to choose from to take out on a date. One, is the always stunning and hilarious Rebel Wilson, the other the extremely talented and beautiful Nicole Scherzinger. You could only pick one to take out, so who would you choose? If you said Nicole than congratulations you just proved my point but if you picked Rebel than let's just say I wish there we're less hypothetical guys and more real guys in the world like you, but let's face it most guys will choose Nicole scherzinger for her perfect body, looks , talent, and.... money. It's the same situation for when a women that looks like let's say Nicole goes for a job interview against another women who looks like let's say Rebel. They're both equally qualified for this job based off of experience and the deciding factor comes down to first appearances, Nicole would probably get the job based off of looks alone. As wrong and superficial as it may sound it happens more than you know, it's happened to people I know and to people I barely even talk too. I know some of you reading this disagree with me and that is absolutely fine, but in my opinion we live in a society that bases everything off of first appearances or more like first glances and that itself can create insecurities in women of every age and that's one thing you can't deny.So what if we don't fit this mold of what's considered to be "beautiful"? What if we don't have perfect glowing skin or a Victoria's Secret body. What if we're not blonde bombshells and believe that being sexy doesn't include walking outside in shirts that could be a bra? What does that make us? Ugly or different, an outcast to society or a role model to young girls? To society we could be all of the above. You see, you have true genuine people who will accept you for who you are but then you have people who will judge you based off of what you wear or how you present yourself and don't even try to get to know the person behind the skin disease instead they see someone who looks or acts a little different and all the sudden you're a freak show. But in a world with a population of over 7 billion people you can't expect us all to be perfect. We all have flaws and we shouldn't be punished for something perfectly normal for a person to have, and you shouldn't punish yourself just because you look a certain way or because you prefer to listen to Backstreet boys instead of One Direction. Sure you're different but that's what makes us human no one's perfect so why are we trying so hard to be? By now I'm sure you understand how society depicts women through social media, but what we have yet to cover goes far beyond appearances. What am I talking about? I'm talking about jobs. Yes jobs.Women are well known for dominating the world of fashion and makeup. Some branch off to become teachers or nurses but when a woman breaks what's considered the new norm people make it seem like the universe was thrown off it's natural balance or the world is coming to an end. With this new era of women empowerment it's becoming more obvious that these gender roles have started to die off. To me one of the most inspiring sights to see is a woman working in a predominately male job space and still holding her own. I went over to pay our local firefighters a visit for the holidays and after hours of extremely detailed stories derived from their own experiences we sat down for our own version of a thanksgiving feast a day before thanksgiving. It was beautiful although we all were squished around a relatively small table for a relatively big group of people. As we ate, I couldn't help but realize the amount of women working in that house were almost but not quite equal to men .Whether they we're firefighters, paramedics, or just working behind the scenes the number of females there was a lot bigger than what I expected to see. It acme to me as a bit of a shock because normally when I think firefighter I naturally think of these hot guys in uniform off to save the day (Guilty I know.)  but in a way I wasn't surprised with the gender distribution going on here. Now more than ever women are taking opportunities that would've never been given or even offered to them because of their gender. And to see women go off in the military or volunteering as a firefighter and sacrificing their lives for ours is groundbreaking and the most inspiring sight to see. These women are people I look up too and hope my future children will too and hopefully not these celebrities people showcase as being the perfect role model even though I think that's unavoidable. Women aren't just showing up more in these professions but everywhere you can think of. Either as photographers or D.J.'s, some have even branched out into corporate offices taking spots usually only offered to men. I personally would've never guessed that would happen just by looking through what women we're put through in the past. Writing this post hit really close to home because if you don't fit this mold of what society has created of being "beautiful" then you risk the chance of being bullied or if you do decide to work in a predominately male job space you risk being hazed by male employees or coworkers. Surprisingly a lot of people throughout the world go through these situations on a daily basis and they can lead to a catastrophic ending that could've been prevented in the first place. I also wanted to touch base on a few modern day problems that the average woman faces everyday so people can start to understand what other people go through and can sort of put yourself in their shoes. I wanted to show girls this mold isn't permanent, we can change how society perceives the average the average woman but it all begins with YOU. If you believe all these comparisons that society's laid out for you on a silver platter, how can you prove to people you're beautiful the way you are if you don't believe it yourself? I know trying to believe it is hard especially if you're trying to find someone in this materialistic world you can relate too can be even harder. Especially if you try to do it all alone, that's why were here. To provide a non-biased site centered around you the way you are no matter how weird or different you maybe. Here all the judgement from the outside world fades away and is replaced with strength, encouragement, and love. We are human beings every single one of us we maybe different on the outside but in the inside we're all the same. And it's time to embrace that and were here to show you how. So now that the deep cheesy part is over don't forget to follow @beauty_breaking on twitter and tweet us your stories under the hashtag #breakthemold. Remember when you begin to love yourself everything else just falls into place.          

Monday, November 25, 2013

10 ways to be in a successful relationship with..... Yourself!!!!!!!

"You yourself, as much as anybody else in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection."-Buddha


We all have times when we look in the mirror and say "If I could fix this" or "If only I could change that", but changing your outside appearance won't change how you feel about yourself from the inside out. So here's what I did everyday to help me on my journey to self acceptance.
  1. Go ahead hit that snooze button.
Yes, I am giving you permission to hit the snooze button, but not for sneaking in some extra z'ss. Instead take this time to amp yourself up for the day ahead, repeat positive thoughts and TRY to forget about your boy drama or destructive boss. Enjoy your moment of peace before entering back into the cruel reality of the real world. 

   2. Release your "Inner Buddha"

At least once everyday we encounter those evil little thoughts trying to break down our self esteem, Combat the first sign of negativity with positivity. Replace that negative thought with something you love about yourself, whether it'd be your favorite personality trait or a huge achievement in your life. Repeating them daily can help boost your confidence levels.

  3.Always be nice to yourself.

You are your worst critic, so take time throughout the day just to focus on yourself! Try focusing on your positive traits, strengths, abilities, and let go of all the harsh judgement or comparisons you may have encountered throughout the day.

  4.Take a break from yourself!

Hello, nobody's perfect! You don't have to be right all the time, not everyone is happy everyday, and everyone makes mistakes every once in a while! It's totally normal to hit low points in life, embrace them without judging yourself too much.

  5. Count your blessings.

It's easier to love yourself when you start to appreciate all the things you have in your life. Write down at least one thing your grateful for evryday and take some time each day to reflect on it.

  6. Do more of what makes you happy.

Did you stop a hobby because of what someone else thought about it or because you were afraid of what people may think? Think of a hobby that makes you happy and like Nike says "just do it", or think of hobby that you once enjoyed and start it up again! you never know you might start a career out of it.

  7. Raid your closet

You maybe thinking, what? why? Well you know those outfits that when you wear them you think "I really hope I don't run into that cute guy from across the hall today" yeah everyone has them, and sadly it's time to say your goodbyes. Get rid of all those clothes that don't make you feel like you can take on the world and keep the ones that make you feel amazing. To help cope with your loss replenish your wardrobe with some serious retail therapy.

  8.Make positivity lists!

Make a list of all the things you love about yourself, read them everyday in the morning and at night to help remind yourself how fabulous you really are!!

  9.Stop making excuses!

Do that class you've always wanted to do, go skydiving, ask out your crush. Examine all the reasons why you say you can't do something and try to make it happen. There's no better feeling than knowing you achieved a goal while scratching something off your bucket list at the same time.

  10. And Finally...... Embrace yourself!

Like I said earlier, nobody's perfect everyone has insecurities that's what makes us human. Stop picking apart your flaws and accept them. Remember you're imperfectly perfect, and when you truly accept your flaws everything else falls into place.

This is what I did everyday to help me feel confident about myself again. These 10 things helped me on my journey to self acceptance and I hope they help you too!



Sunday, November 24, 2013

Acne is more than skin deep, How to really love the skin you're in.

"It's time to stop focusing on our flaws and appreciate what you love about your body" - Emily VanCamp

Acne, (definately doesn't look like this picture) we've all suffered with it at some point of our lives, some earlier and longer than others.  While some people eventually outgrow their acne outbursts, others like me aren't so lucky. I've been struggling with acne for as long as I can remember, and through the years I've tried almost every product there is in existence claiming to help cure or at least manage your acne with barely any results. Anyone whose gone through the same thing as me can agree it can be very emotional trying products everyone's raved over and have experienced miracles with, just to come out with a face filled of empty promises and a bigger dent in your pocket. Acne is basically a pre-packaged deal, an expensive bundle of emotional torture and self acceptance. It can make you feel extremely insecure, like you don't want to go outside for the fear of judge mental whispers or remarks and can create insecurities you didn't even know you could have after hours of examining you're face in the mirror each day. I went through these emotions pretty much everyday, I tried to avoid face to face contact because I was afraid of what people would think of my acne. Soon, as ridiculous as this may sound, acne started to run my life. My confidence levels shot down like temperatures during an east coast snow storm. I isolated myself from everyone other than my close friends. You may ask yourself why would I do that and wouldn't that make things worse? I did it because I wanted to avoid all the looks that came as a bonus in my pre-packaged acne deal. Plus makeup couldn't hide the emotional scarring from years of failed attempts and ruthless bullying. So to me I was doing myself a favor. One day after waking up to yet another breakout I did something completely crazy. Instead of reaching for my acne creams and concealers I threw them away. No, not far in the back of my cabinet (you know out of sight, out of mind) but in the trash. I threw away all my acne pills, foundations, concealers, powders, bronzers and blush, with the exception of a $60 blush I got from London, (Come on,  it was from London!) everything was gone!! I was tired of covering up the one thing I was most ashamed of and to be honest it was  really a great feeling knowing I didn't have to anymore. In a moment of clarity I couldn't help but think "What did I just do?" and "Great, I can't turn back now". All kinds of emotions went through my head. I didn't know what was worse, the fact that I threw away what had to be over $200 worth of makeup, or the fact that I had to accept the fact that I had to go outside bare faced. Nothing but me and my acne, and a little bit of mascara but that's besides the point. It was time to take back my life, I was officially on the journey to love who I was, flaws and all. The first couple of days were undoubtedly the most uncomfortable days of my life, going outside with everyone looking at me and pointing made me feel like some kind of freak show. And for the first time in a long time, I felt vulnerable and exposed, but I knew I had to accept it to move on in my journey to self acceptance. Before I knew it,  I began to switch the way I thought about people and things. I really started to understand that people are gonna judge you no matter what even if you somehow manage to successfully cover up all your acne or if you think you picked out the best outfit and makeup to match. There's always something, whether it's the way you walk or the way you present yourself. Sure not everyone is like that, but let's admit it we've all had a moment where we thought "why even wear socks with sandals? Are you hot or are you cold? make up your mind." No, probably just me. Anyway my point is people are gonna talk so like the famous Bonnie Raitt once said: "Let's give them something to talk about." and for the first time instead of running from all the criticism I embraced it, I had no choice but to try and it worked, I finally started to accept myself and my flaws. After about 2 weeks of no makeup, eating clean (and by eating clean I mean incorporating more salads into my diet instead of just on my burger. Baby steps guys, baby steps..) taking the right vitamins(the gummy ones are the best), yoga and a lot of soul searching I went from asking why me? to why didn't I do this sooner? You see, I finally realized I have nothing to be embarrassed about. Sure I'm no Victoria's secret model, but in a world with a population of over 7 billion people obviously not everyone will look like one and that's OK. Everyone has flaws you just have to accept them and ignore what everyone else thinks. Sure you may have acne and yes people are gonna judge you because you don't fit the mold of what society says is  "beautiful"  but remember you're doing or have done what most people can't do and that's accept yourself as is. Showing people you're not afraid of what they think is more powerful than any name anyone can call you, and showing yourself  that if you can expose the one thing you're most self conscious about then you can do anything. So go ahead, go outside and rock those socks and sandals like you were the one who invented the trend, and remember everyone has insecurities, don't judge others, and learn to embrace your own. So my challenge to you  is to try the #bareitallchallenge. Let's see how long you can go with no makeup that includes: foundations, concealers, powders, bronzers,and blush, no eyeliner, no false lashes, or eyeshadow, and no you can not fill in your brows. Although a little mascara won't hurt, only A LITTLE!!!!! and none of those "no makeup makeup" looks count, that is definately considered cheating. Track your progress with us by tweeting us your pictures and stories under the hashtag  #bareitallchallenge and follow @beauty_breaking on twitter! Are you ready to bare it all?