Monday, November 18, 2013

Exposed: The truth behind bullying

"Courage is fire, and bullying is smoke." -Benjamin disraeli.
When you think of bullies what comes to mind, is it the picture of an older kid hustling someone else for lunch money or degrading words viewed on a computer screen? We all know bullying comes in all shapes and sizes, and with all these anti-bullying campaigns you would think we would be somewhat close to stopping it. Yeah we we're so wrong, and here's why. Recently I took a trip down memory lane by visiting my old high school. Walking through those doors for what felt like the millionth time I was struck by a brush of nostalgia. The smells of puberty polluted the air accompanied by the sounds of teachers yelling and students talking about grades and girls (but mostly girls) Ahhh don't we all just miss high school?? Anyway, Walking through those crowded hallways felt like going on a safari through the jungle. There we're groups of kids segregated into cliques crowded at different points of the hallway, like packs of animals waiting for the kill and anytime a girl walked past the "cat calls" started, like a pack of lions in heat. As I continued to dodge all the couples and their inappropriate displays of affection I was abruptly stopped by what I call a mean girl. Now everyone knows "those girls" the ones with the perfect body, perfect hair, the perfect boyfriend, need I say more? After an intense 30 second stare down in the intersection of a fairly crowded hallway, the girl politely asks "Are you gonna move or what?" At this moment I'm probably thinking the same thing as you. My first instinct was to reply with "oh no this (insert word of choice here) did not!!!" but the logical side of my brain was telling me "Calm down you could get arrested." So I moved with no intention of ever seeing her again and went along with my way. With that being said, I finally reached my destination alive. I had a meeting with one of my old teachers to pick up some papers for a friend. As I sat down to talk to her I couldn't help but notice a kid sitting in the back corner of her room, curious I asked who she was. Not even my teacher could provide her name. So being the nosey intruder I am, I introduced myself, we talked for the remainder of lunch and when it was over I walked with her through the crowded hallways experiencing high school all over again but from her point of view. As we we're walking she told me stories about how she was relentlessly bullied because of her weight and acne. kids would refer to her as "thunder thighs' or "Porker". She continued to tell me that no one would hang out with her because of the way she was dressed. This girl was literally exiled and tortured to the point of where she just started eating alone. I couldn't understand she was smart, funny and sarcastic (in a good way)she was thoughtful (she offered to buy me lunch) and creative. She was wearing this stunning scarf she knitted by herself and even offered to make me one. This girl was a prime example of being beautiful inside and out, yet she was the main target of inconsiderate, hateful bullies. We eventually had to part ways for obvious reasons, but meeting her completely changed me. I knew what it was like to be bullied, but never have I seen it through someone else's eyes. Although I just recently graduated high school somethings never change, and like always reputation was everything. No one would hang out with her because of the fear of getting judged or labeled,and ruining that all star reputation of theirs. I'm not gonna lie I did the same thing. I never put the other persons feelings in perspective and unfortunately neither do a lot of other people. Being on the receiving end of this kind of situation does suck (Trust me I know), but if I could get through it you can too. When I walked through those doors this time I realized everything was the same and it was, it was me who changed. I never noticed anyone getting bullied because I didn't want too, when in all actuality it was happening all around me by people I used to be friends with! (Yeah,it was bad), but by meeting this girl I began to really see how we as humans judge each other based on appearances and not who we really are. We may look different but we're really all the same. We all have hopes and dreams,we have emotions, we laugh and cry we have faces and a body whether it'd be broken or altered, we're living breathing creatures, so who are we to judge another person based off of pure appearances? Take a moment and look at this picture to the right
What do you see? The obvious answer here is 3 different types of eggs. Here's where it gets a little weird. I want you to take a second and pretend we're those eggs. On the outside we're different. Different textures, colors, and even sizes but when you crack each egg open what do you get?? Yolk. No matter how different the outside is the inside remains the same. What I want you as the reader to take away from this is we're all human and no matter how different we may look or act on the outside we are all the same. So what gives you the right to judge? To all my girls out there struggling from a situation like this one know you're not alone, and things will get better. Trust me reading this it may sound like another empty promise but it will get better and I want you to follow me on your journey and we can go through it together so you know for sure you won't ever be alone. Stay strong and continue to redefine what it means to be different. Want a sneak peek of our next article?? follow @beauty_breaking on twitter!! Tweet us suggestions, comments, or stories we love hearing from you!

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